The University of Washington.

The “Song to Put on Repeat” of the Day: Claire de Lune – Claude Debussy

 

I was incredibly surprised the day I received my acceptance letter from UW. Never had I expected to accomplish the feat of becoming a part of such a prestigious school. I was shocked, my parents were ecstatic, and for the most part it never really made me all too happy. I never jumped for joy, I didn’t run around the house crazily, I just simply accepted the fact and signed the paper in order to accept the position as a student at the University of Washington. I believe I was more indifferent at the time more than anything. At that moment it would not have made a difference if I had been accepted into the school or not. I never quite thought I was up to par with the level of intelligence I had to offer. In my eyes the school could have done so much better; why me? What on earth do I have to offer them? I’m just an average student, I’ve done nothing special…

 

But I guess over time my opinion started to change. A lot of my other friends had received their acceptance letters as well and I thought, “Oh joy. I will still get to be with my friends”. I was starting to get excited, “I’m going to UW. I, Stefanie Henkel, studied and worked hard, and is going to attend the University of freaking Washington”. I was soon to join the ranks of brilliant minds; I would sit in class with geniuses and listen to incredibly gifted professors give lectures on quantum mechanics and neurology. I would have late night, intellectual discussions with my fellow peers, offering up different theories and explanations in an attempt to explain black holes, or even hovering over a deoxyribose nucleic acid strand for hours noting each intron, exon, and codon in order to understand the genetic information given in this tiny chain of repeating nucleotides held together by phosphates and sugars. I was going to write books with incredible philosophical teachings after becoming so enlightened by all the intellectuals I would soon be associated with.

 

Dreams only last so long. It all came crashing down as soon as discussions began. People would open their mouths and no golden words came out, I heard no music. All that came out was nonsense, an incessant blabber of an idiot. I thought to myself, no this cannot be, maybe it is just this class. But everywhere I turned, cretin upon cretin fell upon me, their useless words clashing through my ears and burning themselves into my brain. I thought it ludicrous, that at such a prestigious school so many clueless people were to be called my peers, my fellow classmates. This person couldn’t understand exponential growth and decay (basic algebra mind you). The next can’t comprehend the structure of communism and the fight against the bourgeois. All that came out of her mouth was nothing, she rambled on about something that no one could understand, everything neither relating to the subject or anything about politics. The teacher assistants, the ones who would be giving my grade, could either barely explain the subject themselves, or couldn’t even spell anything.  I was surrounded by idiots, and this is what has become of the University of Washington. What was once a grand and glorious heaven on earth, a place to immerse yourself with knowledge of the world, was filled with nothing but young adults who can’t even tie their own shoes…

 

There are always exceptions to every rule, and there has always been a few beams of light shining down upon me wherever I went. They would let me into their light and I would have a glimmer of the truth and beauty of knowledge. Oh how I would yearn to stay in their presence to gather as much wisdom as I could, but unfortunately every class must come to a close. Some of the professors I have had have truly been so much more than a beam of light. The heavens would open and there I would sit, once alone and cold sitting in a tight lecture chair with my pen longing to write, feeling the warmth of the souls of so many other intellectuals before me. Their studies and findings have brought us here to this moment, and from here on we are to use that and expand to explain the infinite questions of the cosmos. Those professors were always left unappreciated by those imbeciles, how could they not be carried away by the magnificent music that leapt from their mouths? Golden notes would pour out and surround the room creating dancing words upon my paper.

Oh glorious Knowledge,
How doth I come to love thee so?
When others know not of your glory,
Too ignorant to receive the blessings in which you give.
Exceptions there are, mind you, very few,
Who come to honor thee as thou live….

 

My mind escapes me to finish the poem, written by someone and read somewhere, but of course remembering is the problem…

 

Seeing these people, these imbeciles, these idiots sitting next to me in class only makes me wonder about my own accomplishments. Do I really deserve to be here? What was it on my application that they liked enough to accept me? I thought I was better than them, but am I really any different? Au contraire, maybe I am one in the same…

 

No more do I feel special about being able to attend such a prestigious school. The beauty of it all has diminished and fallen apart leaving nothing but solemn ashes. When those younger than me tell me of their acceptance into the same school, it does not excite me. In all honesty I don’t feel like they’ve accomplished anything. Even though they are brilliant and very much deserving of it, those cretins are still on the same level as you and I. We who are worthy of calling ourselves intelligent and educated are no different from the ignorant people who walk this planet. There is nothing special about an education anymore, especially one from such a notable school.

 

In this world, this society, we will always strive to be something more. But remember, there will always be some undeserving dunce standing next to you expecting the same thing that you actually worked hard to achieve.

I Can’t Spend Anymore Money…

The “Song to Put on Repeat” of the Day: What It Is (Strike a Pose) – Lil Mama

 

 

So…………..

 

 

I got a new phone. I bought a Blackberry Storm. It’s awesome. It goes for four hundred and ninety nine dollars.

 

I only paid one hundred for it.

 

 

 

 

Then today, I didn’t intend on it, but I bought a car.

 

 

 

I don’t know how I feel at the moment exactly. I love that car though. I’ve had the hots for it ever since it first came out.

 

I think I’m going to be happy.

 

 

 

So…. I don’t have any money anymore.

Oh Sweet Neverland…

The “Song to Put on Repeat” of the Day: Be My 1004 by iM

 

Ever since I was little I’ve always wanted to be whisked away from this world to Neverland. Then I would never have to grow up. I’ll never have to worry about anything that afflicts us in this stressful world.

Oh dearest Peter Pan, come to my window and take me away…

 

 

Hehehe but I highly doubt thats going to happen… but I can still wish right?

 

 

I must say that I am pretty happy with my schedule for next quarter. I don’t have to go to school Tuesday or Thursday. How awesome is that!?

 

Hmm… it’s interesting because I always have things that I want to say on here… but then by the time I actually sit down to write something, nothing comes out.

 

I’m sure I’ll have a profound post someday…

Tired. And… not feeling too hot.

The “Song to Put on Repeat” of the Day: Gibberish by Ryan Leslie

 

Life is messed up.

They say to enjoy it. But honestly I don’t think that happens very often.

 

How does one enjoy it?

 

I don’t know….

 

 

I watched “He’s Just Not That Into You” today. It wasn’t that great. I thought a couple of the women were incredibly annoying. Like the chick with the short hair named Gigi. Annoying as hell. But some of the stuff was pretty predictable… But while I was sitting there watching the movie, I was thinking that if there really are women out there like these… Oh man. How pathetic. This is why I don’t like being associated with women. There’s too many retards out there that put out a bad name for women in general. I didn’t think that this whole dating game could be so difficult to understand for some women. But apparently it is. Oh well. Not my problem.

Well at least I proved that I’m not turning into a chick. Some people have been saying that I’ve been getting girly…

Horrible. My worst nightmare. But… I think after watching this movie I’m not turning girly at all. Hahaha I felt so unsatisfied at the end of the movie. I need to see some blood. Someone killing someone. RAMBO!!! Now that’s a good movie.

 

Well at least Scarlett Johansson has a nice rack.

procrastination seems to be my best friend.

The “Song to Put on Repeat” of the Day: 불끈송 by Brown Eyed Girls

 

I’m sitting here in front of the TV, not doing my homework like I should be. I think I’ve accepted the fact that I’m not going to do well on my midterm this Friday. Oh well…

Today was a beautiful day! While I was driving to work I had the window rolled down and had the radio cranked up. It felt so nice to feel the breeze on my face and the heat from the sun through the window. I even busted out my Oakley shades and wore them while driving. It was just really nice. And then of course dinner was nice as well…

Oiy…. now to rant.

I don’t like college. Well… let me rephrase that. I don’t like certain aspects of college. For example, I hate these classes where your grade is solely based on a few exams. That’s what my psychology class is. Three exams. Two midterms and one final. Brilliant. So I will be graded on my ability to memorize information. That’s always good…

I’m a person who learns by doing, not by listening. I mean sure I can get some stuff, but nothing is going to stick unless if I actually get up and do something. So there it is. My grade is going to be based on how well I can memorize the information. Too bad I’m really bad at memorizing stuff…

Just getting started…

So… I like to write. And I like to put my thoughts into writing. And I also figured, “Why not share them with people?”

Today was good I suppose. Just long. Getting worried about my midterm and my paper that need to be done this week.

Oh well… I’m just looking forward to three weeks from now. SPRING BREAK BABY!!!

 

Anyways onto more important subjects.

 

So the majority of you already know that I want to be a high school English teacher. Unfortunately my parents aren’t very hip on the idea. My mother doesn’t want me to do it because she keeps complaining how I’m going to be poor. My father on the other hand… well I guess he doesn’t really mind if I become a teacher, he just doesn’t want me to major in English because he thinks that I’m wasting my education. Oh well… what can you do. I keep telling myself that I’m going to do what I want to do. My future, my life, my choice. I guess I’m just really sick and tired of people telling me what I can and cannot do. I don’t consider myself an adult or anything, but I do feel like I am capable of making some decisions. How am I supposed to grow up if my parents are still making decisions for me?

I don’t know. It just gets incredibly frustrating sometimes.